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Posts Tagged ‘self-defense’

“FEMALES & GUNS”, Myths=Excuses / Facts=Reality

October 23, 2012 Comments off

Even though I have shot guns since I was in junior high school, had a concealed carry permit in my lifetime and I support the Right To Bear Arms; I do not support the myth, “I own a gun and that is the best possible method of self-defense. If someone attacks me, I can use it to protect myself.”

Let’s take a look at why not……the facts/reality of such myth. First, I say congratulations! I have heard this comment from females and males on behalf of the women in their lives with a cavalier attitude – all thinking/feeling that if owning a gun is the only sufficient method of personal safety/self-defense. Weapons are advantageous and necessary when situations demand their use. Our military are not equipped with bottles of pepper spray, really loud whistles and table knives. Our soldiers are armed with top-of-the line deadly weapons in order to fulfill their duties to be able to fight defensively during wartime. Good common sense.

Supporting the right to bear arms comes in when you wake up in the middle of the night, you hear a strange noise, having a gun safely in your night stand is a good thing. You will probably have enough time to make a 911 call; get your weapon, gather up enough courage to head toward the direction of the noise and attempt to intimidate and stall him until the police arrive. A gun is a handy when it is used with KNOWLEDGE, GOOD JUDGMENT AND RESPECT. Most important…….it’s best IF you have time to use it.

Realistically, when you are attacked by an assailant, it happens without warning. You are not given the smallest margin of time to prepare your defense. I don’t care what your weapon of choice is you will not be given the time necessary to pull it out and use it. If you are unexpectedly pushed or ambushed to the ground, even if you have your weapon in your pocketbook, it’s not going to help the situation. When faced with predicaments the call for immediate personal safety training/self-defense, only two thing are readily available – your MIND AND BODY. That’s all you have.

Guns are useful in certain situations or as a means of intimidation; the odds of being able to access a weapon in enough time so that it retains its benefits are pretty damn slim. A gun in your safety box or save at your home won’t help you when someone attacks you while you are jogging in the park.

Learn how to use yourself as a weapon and you might not have to worry about owning a gun. This same principle applies to any weapons – including pepper spray, Mace or knives.

Food for thought…….why do you think our military and law enforcement are taught “hand-to-hand combat” extensively in training? Simple answer…….they may not have enough time to draw their weapons to defend themselves in an altercation. They must know how to protect and defend themselves “realistically” with their minds and bodies rather than depending on their weapon.

So, why wouldn’t you do everything in your power to learn how to use your mind and body “realistically” to defend yourself?

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Stalking IS a C-R-I-M-E!

January 7, 2012 3 comments

STALKING IS A CRIME!

“He Was Really Scary…I Had a Stalker”

Me and my mom were volunteering to set up for a dance at a country club. We’d already volunteered a few times, but this time we met a few other volunteers there. There was a woman and her son. So her son kept coming up to me and asking me questions about how to set up the tables and where they kept the food we were supposed to put out, so basically all of the questions the guy who owned the place had already answered. I figured he just needed a friend. I wasn’t creeped out until he started staring at me. I would look at him and he would look away, but right when I looked away out of the corner of my eye I could see him looking at me again. I was kind of freaked out, so after I was done volunteering that day my mom said we could leave. I went to get my coat and he followed me and asked me if I was coming to the dance. I told him no, and he looked like he was very mad at me and he walked away. So me and my mom leave, and I forget about this guy. Then like 2 weeks later I get this phone call, and I answer and it’s the guy I met at the volunteering place. He asks me if I’m busy that day and I tell him sorry I am and he yells at me and hangs up. I never gave him my number and I wasn’t sure how he got it. Then he called later that night and said he was sorry for calling and yelling at me. He asks me if I’m busy the next day. I tell him I’m sorry but I am. He doesn’t say anything and he just says bye and hangs up. So basically he just kept calling me every day and asking me if I was busy. I got sick of him calling and when he would call I would have a family member answer and say I wasn’t home. Then in the middle of the night I was up and I was in the kitchen getting something to drink when I hear a knock at my slider door and I see him standing there with a flashlight. I screamed and then ran to my parents room. My dad gets up and he doesn’t see him and our door was locked so we know he didn’t get inside. I slept in their room and then a few months passed. He calls my house again and asks me why I didn’t let him in. I hang up on him and block his number. He gets another phone and calls my house and he asks why his girlfriend (me) blocked his number. I told him I wasn’t his girlfriend and he needs to leave me alone or I was going to call the cops. He chickens out for a few years. Then I’m in my senior year of high school and he comes to my door asking if I remember him. I tell him that I have a boyfriend and that he needs to go away. He waited outside my school in the parking lot and then he asked if i wanted a ride. I tell him no I have a ride and he gets mad and yells at me. I got a ride from one of my friends and he follows us so she drives around and eventually he gives up. A few days later her tires are slashed. I’m asleep in my room the next night and he breaks open my window and comes inside. I’m screaming at the top of my lungs but my parents are on a cruise and I’m the only one home. I was positive I was going to die. I finally stop screaming because I’m crying so hard and he’s just making it worse by trying to hug me and comfort me and crap and I start screaming for help. He says he’s going to take me somewhere and were going to run away together and while he’s saying his whole plan the cops get there. He tried to run but the cops cought him and then took him to prison. So now it’s years later and I’m married and I found out the neighbor across the street heard me screaming and called the cops when she saw the window broken. I also found out that the guy who owned the country club gave him my address because he said we left stuff there and he was going to bring it to our house. So I’ve never volunteered anywhere besides schools ever since then.

The above stalking victim wrote in her own words what and how her stalker stalked her.  I find that it helps to share with readers real life experiences of victims so just perhaps you will have a better understanding of the devastating effects that stalking have on victims of this serious crime.

As you can see stalking cases are carried out by ex-partners or by someone that you have never had close relationship with, many victims have never even met their stalker. Often a victim’s stalker can be someone known through work, or a friend of a friend or it could be someone you pass on the street. And with the internet as huge as it is, sometimes people never set eyes on their stalker.

One of the main problems is that so many of us are brought up to be polite and kind, and rather to rebuff unwanted attention, we often let it go. We find ourselves in slightly awkward situations and do not make it clear that we are unhappy. For example, with repeated text messages from someone we don’t know well, we might reply politely to one or two. After that we might ignore them, when perhaps the best although not necessarily the easiest thing to do is say that you do not want any more texts. The number of stalking victims are alarming and terrifying.

Victims must get help that they need and deserve. Until a victim speaks to someone who has been stalked, you never will fully understand how terrifying it truly is. Being stalked is extremely distressing, a victim is used as a plaything for the stalker’s amusement.

Stalking is a serious crime which usually hits the headlines when it’s linked to A-list celebs, but falling prey to a stalker is something that never crosses most of our minds. Stalking is on the rise as both women and men are being targeted by predatory stalkers.

If you are stalked:

First and foremost, have no contact with your stalker.

  • Show no emotion, regardless of how scared or angry you are. Never confront or agree to meet your stalker.
  • Trust your instincts. If you feel uncomfortable reach out for help.
  • Carry a cell phone with you at all times. Keep handy, memorize emergency phone numbers or program them into your speed dial in case of an emergency.
  • Call your local law enforcement and file a report of all incidents.
  • Tell your friends, family, neighbors, work colleagues and employer. All have the right to know what is happening for your safety as well as their own.
  • Try not to travel alone. Always vary your routes to and from work or school, the grocery store and any other places regularly visited. By changing your daily routes, it could make it more difficult for someone to learn your routine. If you run or walk for exercise, always get a friend (buddy) to go with you.
  • Keep evidence like texts, emails, letters and parcels. Record anything that could be proof and keep Stalker and Incident Behavior Log for reference.
  • If you are being followed, try to stay calm. If you’re driving, head for the nearest police department to get help.
  • If you ever feel in imminent danger, call 911.

The more the public becomes aware of the effects and toll that stalking can do to a victim – perhaps the more we will realize that STALKING IS A CRIME and it is NEVER the victim’s fault.

Every day should be an internal check about every awareness. Focusing on just one month a year of any specific cause is so minuet as the EPIDEMIC of assaults on females are off the charts.

STALKING: KNOW IT. NAME IT. STOP IT.

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Back By Popular Demand, Anny Jacoby and Crime Time with Vito Colucci, Part 2

September 9, 2011 Comments off

Sunday Night, September 11, 11pm ET

on Business Talk Radio

Listen LIVE: http://businesstalkradio.net/weekend_host/ctvc.shtml

Back for another run!  Vito Colucci invites Anny Jacoby back to the show to continue the conversation.  On this show they will discuss the importance of college campus safety, street smarts, carjacking and safety, stranger asking for directions, and knowing your surroundings.  Everyone will want to listen to the information on this show to know how to stay safe in a dangerous world!

Crime Time with Vito Colucci, P.I.  features anything crime related. Current high profile cases or trials are discussed in detail with commentary from experts in law  enforcement, investigators and lawyers.

Vito Colucci, Jr.

Vito Colucci, Jr., owner of Colucci Investigations LLC, is a former member of the Stamford, CT Police Department where he worked as a Narcotic’s Detective and Undercover Organized Crime Investigator. One of the main investigations Vito spearheaded during that time was uncovering the organized crime ties within his own police department.

Vito has been a private investigator for the past 22 years, working many high profile cases; Michael Skakel/Martha Moxley case, Jayson William’s case, and honeymooner, George Smith’s case .

Vito Colucci is a regular commentator on various news programs including: Fox News MSNBC, Catherine Crier/Court TV, Star Jones, Glenn Beck, Nancy Grace, Larry King, CNN Headline News, and The Bill O’Reilly Show, as well as being a featured speaker at the first World Investigator’s Conference in LasVegas in 2005.

Anny’s mission is to reach out to every avenue available to teach these skills at the corporate level, to emergency services, victim support groups and agencies, schools, colleges and health service providers.  Her professional programs are designed for every age group from children to seniors, as well as a program designed specifically for the disabled.

Recently, Anny has developed a new division to her company, Project Safe Girls, which is designed specifically for girls and is used in after school programs, girl’s organizations and YWCAs, to name a few of the target areas.  Specific curriculum and training is developed for age appropriate

Anny’s program is not traditional “self-defense” nor martial arts or weapons.  She has developed her training specifically for females and teaches them to use their bodies as their weapon to diffuse a violent situation.

Anny’s style is serious, with compassion and empathy, yet fun and empowering. Her training classes and seminars leave her students with a sense of confidence and an understanding of their intuitions regarding safety. Anny has authored a comprehensive training manual for each student to take with them as reference.

Anny Jacoby is available for speaking engagements, lectures, individual consultations and presentations. She is a Certified PDR (Personal Defense Readiness) Instructor and has a team of male Certified PDR instructors and coaches with The Realistic Female Self-Defense Company who are dedicated to teaching and training only females.

Anny is also an independent contractor as a Certified Prevention Specialist and an Authorized Stewards of Children Facilitator through the Darkness to Light prevention program.  She has developed a passion for educating parents and communities about the issue of child sexual abuse and prevention. She is available to travel throughout the US bringing this important and vital information to all.

For media appearances and inquires or speaking engagements please contact: ImaginePublicity, contact@imaginepublicity.com; 843-808-0859

 

Release produced by ImaginePublicity

Annie Le’s death at Yale puts spotlight on campus security…

August 21, 2011 1 comment

Video surveillance cameras, live cameras monitored 24/7 and official warnings that can be blasted in seconds to tens of thousands via email, cell phone text messages and Facebook. Campus security is more sophisticated than ever, but college officials say they still can’t absolutely guarantee the safety of their students.

“That is impossible,” says Melissa Essary, dean of the Campbell Law School in Raleigh, NC. “There will always be criminals out there who can get away from the best security system.”

Since the Virginia Tech killings, schools around the country have beefed up security substantially, she says. Her school has just one public entrance, staffed full time by a security officer. But a potentially dangerous situation could erupt from within, she says.   “There are potential inside threats as well as outside threats,” Essary says.

Though many colleges have surveillance cameras, only some are live while others are recording devices that would only be examined after the fact, not when a crime is actually occurring.

Student security isn’t only the responsibility of the college, says John Carroll, head of safety and security for all three Fordham campuses. “It is a shared responsibility for the individual, for campus security,  and for the police department,” he says. “I’m sure I speak for my peers at other schools when I say that we will all take a strong look at the Yale incident just like we took a look at Virginia Tech to make sure we are doing everything humanly possible to protect our students.”

Fordham can text, voice and email all 15,000 students in seconds, he says, and a year and a half ago, when an emotionally disturbed person crashed through the gates, the college was able to warn everyone to stay away from the library, where the man, armed with a gun, was headed. “We contained the man and we were able to let everyone know,” Carroll says.

At Pratt Institute, security officers patrol the campus on foot, by car, and on bikes. There are hundreds of closed circuit TV cameras, emergency phones in campus buildings and outdoors, and a strictly enforced card-access only policy to the residence halls, according to William Schmitz, Pratt’s director of safety and security.

Many colleges are starting to use Facebook and Twitter to get out warnings to students, according to the Orlando Sentinel. Their goal is to use social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter to reach as many students as possible as quickly as possible, according to the Sentinel.   The sites offer yet another way to communicate news to students. University of Florida is testing an indoor speaker system that uses Voice Over Internet Protocol, according to the Sentinel, in which announcements can be heard in almost all classrooms.

Still, officials say, it’s impossible to say that a college will always be completely safe.

“A college or university campus is a microcosm of our society,” Schmitz says. “While campus safety and security departments are invested in and committed to safeguarding campuses and students to the fullest extent possible, unfortunately crimes may still may occur.”

The reality of one’s safety and protection ultimately lies within one’s self, never rely upon another individual, staff or a college for you or your daughter’s safety.

Our children/daughters often never learn “life skills” to get them through life.  “Life skills” must be taught to every female of every age.  It’s not being paranoid, it’s about being smart and having tools in your toolbox (mentally and physically) to rely upon.  Learning about awareness, gut instincts and the smell of potential danger can save one’s life.

PREVENTION IS THE ANSWER!

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Contributor in part: NYDailyNews

Habit versus Fear…Home Invasion

August 6, 2011 1 comment

At ten o’clock that night, Lindsay had checked that her doors were locked, as usual, before shutting the lights off and going to bed. She assumed she was safe within the protection of her apartment walls. A typical night coupled with a typical attitude. At four o’clock in the morning, Lindsay’s night drastically changed. Her worst fear had crept out of her nightmares and forced its way into her bedroom.

“Don’t make a sound or I’ll kill you…just do exactly what I say” — a ruthless command and a lethal threat on an innocent human being.  This was not a practical joke carried out by a friend.  It was real and it was happening to Lindsay — a tall, think, ultra-feminine woman who had always thought with confidence, “It (rape) won’t happen to me.” But there he was and there she was.

While Lindsay slept a man had broken into her locked apartment and moved silently into her bedroom.  He woke her from a peaceful sleep with the forceful words, “Don’t make a sound, don’t move.”  That statement would repeat over and over in her mind for years to come.

As this angry man, a man that she had never seen before in her life — stood over her in her bedroom; made one last reminder for her not to do anything.  Lindsay’s mind raced back to her self-defense workshop that she had taken, she was reminded of the emphasis placed on fighting back in order to surprise the attacker.

  • Don’t think of anything other than survival.
  • Look for your window of opportunity – it may be as little as five seconds – when he is vulnerable and to use it to your advantage.
  • Fight back.

And that is what she did.  She knew she needed to remain calm, assess the best time for defense, and strike.

Lindsay did just that.  As she watched his body fly across the room, Lindsay was amazed to see the shock on his face.  He was caught physically and mentally off-guard by her blow that she landed him in the chest with both of her feet, using all the force she could gather.  Lindsay had enough time to escape.  As she ran out of her apartment to get help, he ran too…not after her, but away from her.

Lindsay experienced a life-threatening situation.  It is our responsibility to ensure our own safety.  You may be wondering why Lindsay didn’t hear her intruder as there were no noises of a break-in; the man had a key from the previous tenant who lived in the apartment….previous to Lindsay. 

The landlord never changed the locks when Lindsay moved in!

Personal safety is a habit not a fear. I’ve had students tell me that their family members think that they are scared or paranoid because they lock doors even when they are home; when they go out to walk the dog and in their car.  I’ve heard many parents say that having your children’s carton images with their age and name on your vehicle window was not dangerous.  All of us in the personal safety arena agree, IT IS DANGEROUS! Ask any pedophile who wants an easy target.

The fact is, paranoia will freeze you with fear and fear is the most dangerous mindset of all.

  • Trust your gut feelings, your instincts, intuition
  • Be aware of your surroundings
  • Establish and enforce your personal boundaries
  • Exhibit confident body language
  • Incorporate safety tips into your daily routine and life

The benefits of personal safety impact your entire life in a positive manner.  “An ounce of prevention is a pound of cure.”—-Benjamin Franklin

The people who tell you or call you paranoid for being aware and safe are O-B-L-I-V-I-O-U-S!

The impact of being oblivious and not facing the fact that all type of crimes and assaults are happening on a daily basis is an individual with blinders on.  Electing not be educated or taught how to be safe is just downright ludicrous.

ob·liv·i·ous = unmindful; unconscious; unaware

Synonym – absent-minded (so lost in thought that one does not realize what one is doing, what is happening, etc.; preoccupied to the extent of being unaware of one’s immediate surroundings)

There is nothing wrong with being the brightest light bulb in the room!

What do you think?

 

Take care and STAY SAFE!

“It’s Time To Get Your Head Out Of The Sand…”

July 14, 2011 2 comments

Becoming educated makes a person more understanding, more aware and more comfortable with the truth.  I am personally becoming more and more appalled with parents that do exactly what is displayed in the picture above.  And, then I get phone calls and emails that their daughters have been assaulted and asked to help them through the system at the schools and law enforcement departments.  Makes me shake my head and ask………”Didn’t you even take the opportunity to check into the crimes stats BEFORE even visiting? Or, spend a some money on giving her the education and advantage of personal safety?”  The majority of the time is “NO”.

It is time for females AND parents to get their heads out of the sand, understand the myths (excuses) and learn the facts (reality) of “realisitic” personal safety training/self-defense and to become proactive. There is not one form of personal safety training/self-defense that is 100% guaranteed. Weapons of every kind are not a guarantee either (we’ll look at this too). However, with education at least you may be able to detect (awareness), learn the ability to de-escalate a potentially dangerous situation and ultimately if a physical altercation occurs you will be better equipped with the knowledge of “realistic” defense.

We all have excuses for things in our lives that we don’t do or spend too much time doing. These excuses serve as deterrents preventing us from following through with action and benefits. When you begin to understand or experience the consequences of your excuses you get a really good reality check. This reality check (wake-up call) usually changes your way of thinking automatically.

The “myth concept” not only affects many areas in our lives but also has the same influence in the personal safety training/self-defense world. These myths make females apprehensive toward or opposed to personal safety training/self-defense.

A myth can be and often is used as an excuse for not doing something. 

The attitude, “it won’t happen to me” is a huge myth; every female should look in the mirror and realize that victimization does not discriminate. This is just plain ignorance if you believe that the possibility that you cannot be a victim is true. You have to debunk the thought that learning personal safety training/self-defense carries negative characteristics (aggression, arrogance, or violence). And, by not understanding that if trained properly to obtain the mental and physical abilities that you can possibly prevent or de-escalate an attack is a total underestimation on your part.

When we begin to understand the facts=reality of these myths=excuses we begin to understand objectives, the effectiveness and the technique of personal safety training/self-defense. We can save our life or the life of someone we love. We can prevent ourselves from becoming a statistic of crime. As I stated above, personal safety training/self-defense is not a guaranteed free pass from crime; however, your chances of survival and the ability to detect a possible altercation are increased significantly.

Becoming educated your level of awareness increases or is heightened, your intuition (gut instincts) are better in tune and your physical abilities are sharpened so that your chances of being attacked, raped or murdered are statistically lessened. You won’t broadcast that you know “self-defense” but you won’t walk down a certain street or in an area when your instincts (gut) kicks in and tells you to turn back. When someone grabs you from behind you won’t freeze but immediately your reaction will be to fight back upon recognition of your window of opportunity. You will see that a seemingly hopeless and defenseless situation has more opportunities for defense than you could have ever imagined.

Personal safety training/self-defense is NOT about being paranoid, it IS about being smart!

Knowledge is a powerful tool.

Stop making excuses and do something powerful for yourself and your loved ones – obtain Personal Safety Training. Training (mind, body and soul) that you will have for the rest of your life.

How can any parent put a price tag on the life of their daughter?  Why wouldn’t you want your daughter in high school/middle school and especially college bound to be educated?

Question……beside looking at the pretty websites and visiting University after University…..has anyone truly looked in the stats of these schools as to their crime stats via The Jean Cleary Act or Title IX?  Parents…..do your homework.  In my book……………NO CAMPUS IS CRIME FREE AND THE NUMBER OF FEMALE STUDENTS BEING ASSAULTED (BY SOMEONE THEY KNOW OR RANDOM) IS OFF THE CHARTS.  Parents……give your daughter the tools for her tool belt, give her the opportunity that she will have for the rest of her life.  No parent wants to receive “that phone call”; trust me.  (*Again, no personal safety course is 100% guaranteed, but even if she gains 50% knowledge of what she never had to begin with isn’t that worth something?)  Think about…………long and hard.  Again, can you honestly put a price tag on your daughter’s life?  Most parents answer is “NO”.

How can any female NOT want to be proactive and at least have the knowledge of COULD happen if I don’t know personal safety?  Personal safety is so much more than watching a DVD in your livingroom – it is truly about education and ultimately physically how to protect oneself.  Girls talk to your parents……this is an exciting time but you guys have to know the possibilities and reality.  Not to “scare” you but you have to know the odds and know how to handle situations.

Parents – get involved in your daughter’s safety during college.  Parents or Gals……contact me for details as we are gearing up our tour to bring personal safety training (6 hours on one weekend day) to communities everywhere! Organizers of training’s will train for FREE!

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Back to School: Spotlighting Campus Crimes and Violence…

July 12, 2011 Comments off

It is time to get ready for campus life, with September right around the corner.  Project Safe Girls wants you to be aware and prepared. Awareness is a good first step toward protecting yourself. Being prepared is the best defense.

Campus crimes occur much more frequently than any of us realize. Crimes on College Campuses and crimes nearby college campuses frequently go unreported and/or under reported. A recent study by The U.S. Department of Justice on The Sexual Victimization of College Women reveals some disturbing statistics. Among the findings:

  • Annually 4.9% of college Co-Eds experience a rape. In other words, the victimization rate is 49 rapes per 1000 female students.
  • When one considers that the average college career now lasts 5 years, there is a 25% likelihood of a rape between Freshman Orientation and Graduation Day.
  • This data becomes more disturbing when analyzed by the number of incidents rather than the number of victims. When the analysis is based on incident count the rate increases by nearly 30%. This takes into account women who have been victimized more than once.
  • Crimes categorized as sexual victimization other than rape touched 3.4%, or 34 per 1000, college Co-Eds annually.
  • This data also becomes more disturbing when analyzed by the number of incidents rather than the number of victims. Analyzed this way, the rate increases by a whopping 397%.
  • 9 out of 10 victims know the person who sexually victimizes them.
  • 71% of sexual victimization of college women occurs on a date – known more commonly as date rape.
  • 88%of sexual crimes against women occur between the hours of 6 pm and 6 am.
  • Sexual victimization of college Co-Eds most often occurs in a residence (on or off campus), with nearly 60% occurring in the victim’s own residence, 30% occurring in other campus living quarters and 10% at a Fraternity.
  • Overwhelmingly, data indicates that women who attempt to protect or defend themselves avoid becoming the victim of a completed rape. While protecting or defending oneself is not a 100% guarantee, it is overwhelmingly the best action to take in order to avoid becoming the victim of a completed rape.
  • In the instances where women used force or a self-defense product like pepper spray, Mace, a stun gun or a Taser, just under 31% of the attempted rapes resulted in completed rapes.
  • Shockingly, fewer than 5% of completed or attempted rapes are actually reported to law enforcement officials. Reasons indicated for not doing so include: Not serious enough to report; not clear a crime was committed; not wanting family or others to know; lack of proof; fear of reprisal by the assailant; fear of hostility by police and fear police would not believe the incident occurred or was serious enough.
  • Another frequent and unwanted violation of women on college campuses is stalking. An annual incidence rate 156.5 stalkings per 1000 Co-Eds is reported. Clearly this is a bigger problem and requires further attention, study and consideration.

If you are assaulted or in a dating violence relationship PLEASE REPORT THE INCIDENT to your campus police department AND PRESS CHARGES!  ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS PRESS CRIMINAL CHARGES!  And, I strongly suggest that you go to the local DV or Rape Crisis agency in your college community as well as filing a POLICE REPORT WITH THE TOWN/CITY POLICE DEPARTMENTS!  Cover all of your bases.  Do not leave any rock unturned.

Too many assailants, universities and colleges are getting away with sweeping college crimes under the carpet.  DO NOT ALLOW THIS TO HAPPEN TO YOU!  Remember, YOU DID NOT DESERVE IT!  IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!

Parents – get involved in your daughter’s safety during college.  Parents or Gals……contact me for details as we are gearing up our tour to bring personal safety training (6 hours on one weekend day) to communities everywhere!  Organizers of training’s will train for FREE!

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Little Rock Assailant Gets Life Term

May 1, 2011 1 comment

On May 16, 2010 Haleigh Milwee of Little Rock, Arkansas never gave up as she fought back with her entire soul and being.  Haleigh became a victim of a brutal home invasion and repetitive assaults and beatings.  Shy of a year later Haleigh continued to have the strength and courage to continue in her fight as she finally got justice on Thursday, April 28, 2011.

Jim Huff, Haleigh’s assailant altered her life forever to the point she will never answer the door to help someone again.

A 57-year-old Little Rock man, Jim Huff drew a life sentence Thursday for a brutal May 16, 2010, attack and abduction of a 25-year-old woman, Haleigh Milwee from her midtown home.

A Pulaski County jury of eight women and four men imposed the life term on Jim Tyson Huff for the kidnapping of Haleigh Millwee. He also received 40-year prison terms each for aggravated residential burglary and aggravated robbery convictions and 6-year terms for seconddegree battery and first-degree terroristic threatening counts.

Circuit Judge Herb Wright, acting on the jury’s recommendation, made the sentences consecutive.

The bespectacled Huff, sitting at a table in the fourth-floor courtroom and dressed in a dark gray pinstriped suit with a maroon tie, exhibited no emotion when the jury verdict was read.

Earlier Thursday, the jury had taken about 30 minutes to find him guilty on all five charges. The jurors deliberated about an hour and 15 minutes Thursday afternoon to reach unanimous agreement on the penalties.

According to testimony, Huff holding a small dog, rang the doorbell of the home Millwee shared with two other women on the pretext of asking her whether the dog belonged to her. She was home alone. He eventually forced his way into the house, punched Millwee and pinned her facedown. He removed several items from a bag, including handcuffs, a bandanna, a stress ball, zip ties and a box cutter, placing them in front of her face.

Soon, Millwee testified Wednesday, he had bound her wrists together behind her back and then fastened her wrists to her ankles, blindfolded her with the bandanna and stuffed the squishy plastic bulb in her mouth to gag her. She struggled to escape while he went through the house only to return and beat her momentarily unconscious. At one point, he threatened to cut out her eyes with the box cutter, she said.

As her attacker dragged her outside, Millwee was able to spit out the gag and struggled again to escape. Huff slammed her head onto the concrete sidewalk, knocking her unconscious again. When she regained her senses, she could feel someone moving her and then heard a neighbor – Greg Alagood – yelling at the assailant, asking what he was doing. “Taking her to rehab,” was the reply, according to Millwee’s testimony.

As he dragged her toward his vehicle, she grabbed at bushes, even her car tire. Alagood ran into the yard while yelling to his wife to call 911, prompting the attacker to jump into his sport utility vehicle and drive away.

Prosecutors used the penalty phase of the trial to painta dark picture of Huff. Three women who had previous encounters with Huff dating back several years testified. Millwee and the other women all lived within a mile of the home Huff shared in Leawood with his wife, Debbie, a member of the nursing faculty at the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences.

Kimberly May testified that in 2006 a man went to her door saying he had a work order to repair her telephone. She responded that she was unaware of the work order and her phone was fine but asked him to wait at the door until she checked the phone. Instead, he followed her inside only to find her daughter and granddaughter in the living room. He then asked about her dog, telling her that he had wandered into her backyard to find the dog dead before leaving.

May didn’t call the police, thinking she had “just encountered a weird man. I regret that I didn’t.”

Angel Lee Burnett testified that in 2002 she pulled into her garage late one night to find a man inside. The man ran into her house and out a rear door. Her fiance, a Little Rock police officer, was with her and gave chase but lost him. She later found several undergarments missing. Burnett said she could tell that the man wasn’t expecting her to arrive home with anyone.

“It was pretty apparent to us he saw someone in the passenger seat that wasn’t supposed to be there,” she testified.

In 2009, Christina Wren testified, she was driving home one night when she saw a man at the side of the street bending over “like he was picking up something.” He turned his head “like he didn’t want me to see him.” Wren noted he was wearing a blue latex glove. Wren called 311 to report the incident rather than 911 because it wasn’t an emergency, she said.

All three women testified they recognized Huff when he was arrested in the attack on Millwee.

Later in 2009, Allison Rose testified, she opened the door to her home late one night to find her neighbor, Huff, outside. He told her that something down the hill from herhome was on fire. Her husband, Stan, dressed to go look. While waiting for him, Rose testified, she noticed Huff wearing latex gloves and, in one hand, holding what later turned out to be a BB gun. At that point, she screamed, tried to block Huff from entering the house and wrestled the gun away from him.

A standoff ensued with the Roses telling Huff to return home and Huff refusing to go unless he had the gun. Police eventually arrived, but Huff wasn’t arrested. Charges eventually were filed, but prosecutors said after Thursday’s verdict that they wouldn’t pursue them. Huff was scheduled to stand for a second trial next week.

One of two defense witnesses attorney Jack Lassiter summoned on Huff’s behalf was his wife, who pleaded for a sentence that would allow her to eventually have Huff rejoin her. “I love my husband,” a tearful Debbie Huff said. “He’s my best friend. I’m so lonely without him and so sad. I still believe he deserves our understanding, our compassion and our mercy.”

Under cross-examination from Deputy Prosecuting Attorney Jill Kamps, Debbie Huff only grudgingly acknowledged her husband was guilty of the crimes of which he was accused. She also admitted she was told about DNA evidence. She denied Kamps’ assertions that, according to police, when first told why her husband was arrested, she asked whether his victim had been hurt.

“I can’t speak to their truth,” she said.

Both of Millwee’s parents testified of the psychological fallout their daughter had endured since the attack. Before the attack, she was an outgoing, vivacious young woman just beginning her adult life, they said. Now, she cannot go alone to a grocery store and leaves all lights on at night.

“The cuts, bruises and beating went so deep into her soul it will be a lifetime before she can recover,” her mother, Becky Millwee, testified.

Deputy Prosecuting Attorney Barbara Mariani told the jury that Huff’s actions over the years represented an escalation and that they were coming closer together.

By the time Huff attacked Millwee, he had “thought about everything he was going to do,” Mariani said, recalling Millwee’s testimony showing that Huff laid out the items in front of her. “Think about that escalation when you think about that sentence.”

Noting testimony from defense witnesses about Huff being a friendly man eager to help out neighbors in need, including the Roses, Mariani said he has the “ability to blend in,” an ability that masks his “dark, evil side he can switch on” quickly. It is a nature that cannot be rehabilitated, she said.

Huff altered Millwee’s life forever, Mariani said, to the point she will “never answer the door to help someone again. Justice calls for him to be altered for life. I’m asking for justice here. He doesn’t need to get out.”

Contributing by Arkansas Online

Keeping Haleigh in our thoughts and prayers.

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Being Proactive vs. Reactive IS a Choice

March 22, 2011 2 comments

This post is for females of ALL ages.

There are two primary types of self-defense methods: proactive and reactive. Ideally, you will employ a combination of proactive self -defense methods and not have to rely on your reactive self-defense methods for dealing with potential violence and attackers.

What is Proactive Self Defense?
As the name implies, proactive self-defense are techniques you use before someone attacks you. Being proactive should prevent a dangerous or violent situation from happening and gives you time to put space between you and the possible assailant. For example, if you’re walking down the street and see someone who looks a bit suspicious or who otherwise makes you uncomfortable you have the opportunity to employ proactive self-defense. You can cross the street so you’re walking on the opposite side as the individual you’re unsure about. You can go into a store or public place if you’re in a location where that is possible. Proactive self-defense gives you the opportunity to possibly avoid a confrontation.

When you’re aware of what’s going on around you and of potential dangers, you have time to think about a strategy if a threat occurs. If an attack seems like it’s about to happen, you can make sure you are ready to act giving yourself a better chance at stunning the attacker rather than waiting until he or she is attacking you before trying to make a move.

Being proactive means you’re paying attention to your surroundings. If you’re walking with your head in the clouds and your MP3 player blaring in your ears, you give up your opportunity to be proactive and avoid a potentially dangerous or violent situation. Get the ear buds OUT OF YOUR EARS unless you are in a gym. Do not voluntarily take any of your senses away at any given time.

What is Reactive Defense?

Once you’ve been attacked, the opportunity for proactive defense is gone and now you must employ reactive self-defense methods in order to get away from the attacker. If someone jumps on your back while walking through a dark parking lot, you’re going to have an awfully hard time digging the pepper spray out from the bottom of your bag and spraying an attacker while he or she is attacking you. (I do not promote weapons such as pepper spray, guns, etc. = false security.)

Once you are being attacked the only thing you can do is react to the situation. You have no time to prepare or possibly prevent the situation from happening. Reactive self-defense techniques include physical fighting and attempting to outrun an attacker.

Now take a moment and ask yourself, would you rather be proactive or reactive? Not a tough choice but how many females actually know or learn how to be proactive? The number of females that know how to effectively protect and defend themselves is a small percentage to those that do not.

Any type or form of self-defense begins with knowledge and education. Prevention is the key, being proactive. Unfortunately we are not born with this knowledge, we are born with instincts but we have to be educated on the correct way to use them and how to physically defend ourselves.

I have a challenge for each of you. For one week, set a “daily” Google alert for domestic violence, sexual assault, rape, teen dating violence, abduction, bullying, stalking, murder and any other form of abuse or assault that you can think of that occurs over and over and over, hourly, daily. Read each alert that you get in your email. I mean go to the link and read the horrific reports that you receive. Read each one at least twice. Feel the pain, the turmoil; go to that dark place and put yourself in the victim’s situation. Then go look in the mirror and look at yourself and tell yourself that you have not been given a “free pass” to the possibility of being victimized. Yes, you are special but you must get your head out of the sand and realize that you are not exempt. If you are not educated, if you are not proactive nor know how to be you don’t have a snowballs chance in hell that you would survive an assault. You see anyone can and is victimized. Victimization does not discriminate.

So what do you do now? The majority of females will do nothing, absolutely nothing. Why? Because they have the mentality that “it won’t happen to me”. This post is meant to be a major wake-up call and I pray that I am reaching someone out here.

Google the murder of Jayna Murray in an upscale yoga store in Bethesda, Maryland on March 11, 2010 . When the report originally aired it was reported that two employees were assaulted and one, Jayna Murray was murdered during a botched robbery which escalated. This crime circulated on Saturday when the employee’s were found by a co-worker. Bethesda, surrounding areas, the entire country – females went into panic mode. How could this happen in Bethesda of all places? How could this have happened to Jayna, she was an awesome, sweet, loving person? And, her co-worker assaulted, alive but would live with this horrific crime for the rest of her life.

The country went into a tail spin, stunning everyone. The media went crazy and females everywhere were actively seeking some kind of self-defense training because FINALLY THEY GOT A WAKE-UP CALL!

Why in God’s name does something terrible have to happen for females to get it? Why does it take horrific crimes to be committed against females that gain media attention to make you/them look past their noses?

We now know that Jayna and her co-worker, Brittany Norwood was not sexually assaulted and Norwood has been allegedly charged with Jayna Murray’s murder. But……..what if? What if these two women were sexually assaulted, beaten, murdered and tied up? Can you even begin to imagine?

Now…..things are quieting down because Jayna wasn’t assaulted and murdered by a male. Females will go about their business and become complacent. SHAME ON YOU/THEM!

Perhaps if a victim is educated and knows how to “effectively and realistically” defend herself it doesn’t matter if her assailant is a male or female she would have a fighting chance. Don’t you think?

In order kids to drive, drivers of any age have to attend so many hours of classroom study and must drive with an instructor a set number of hours BEFORE obtaining a license to drive alone. In reality, what are the states teaching these new drivers??????? Defensive driving! Bingo! While driving you are taught to ALWAYS be watching out for the other drivers, anticipating their moves while driving.

I leave you with this thought……..since we teach DEFENSIVE driving techniques why in the world wouldn’t every female want to be taught HOW TO PROTECT AND DEFEND HERSELF? A car can be replaced, a life cannot whether in a car or from an assault.

Do something for yourself, don’t make your parents “make” you take a personal safety course (that’s another post as to what to look for in an effective course). You are not invincible, you are human!

March 21, 2011 Jayna Murray’s Parents Speak Out on GMA:

Jayna never mentioned the woman, Norwood to them. As the news broke of Jayna’s murder and spread thoughout the D.C. suburb that a killer was on the loose, Mrs. Murray said, “It’s the rumors that kill and it just burns you inside.” The family of Jayna Murray is healing through launching a foundation to remember the adventure seeking young women who loved to go bungee jumping. Jayna’s father reflects upon Jayna’s life stating, “One (Jayna) of the most fearless people I’ve every known in my life and that’s the objective as a father can get. I really admired her for everything she did and everything she represented.”

The family has created the Janya Troxel Murray Foundation to remember Janya’s life. For more information on the Janya Troxel Murray Foundation or to send a donation please send your donation to: The Janya Troxel Murray Foundation, P. O. Box 9492, The Woodlands, Texas 77387.

Keeping Jayna, family and friends in our thoughts and prayers. Blessings.

Your comments, feelings and thoughts are welcome. Please leave a comment.

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Risk Assessment of Stalking and Safety Plan Suggestions…

January 23, 2011 Comments off

What is stalking?

While legal definitions of stalking vary from one jurisdiction to another, a good working definition of stalking is a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear.

Stalking is another form of Power and Control; in reality it is mental abuse.

Stalking is serious, often violent, and can escalate over time.

Risk Assessment

Questions to ask a victim:  Has anyone ever:

  • Followed or spied on you more than twice?
  • Made repeated, unwanted phone calls to you?
  • Stood outside your home, school, office?
  • Left unwanted gifts or items for you to find?
  • Vandalized or damaged your property?
  • Repeatedly threatened you/those close to you?
  • Showed up at places you were for no apparent reason?

Safety Plan Suggestions for Victims of Stalking

  • IF YOU HAVE AN EMERGENCY, CALL 911
  • Do not attempt to negotiate with a stalker, do not have any contact or communication.
  • Telling a stalker ten times to leave you alone is nine times too many, be consistent.
  • If you have an order of protection, carry it with you at all times, keep extra copies.
  • If you think you are being stalked, call the police.  Make sure each incident is reported to the police, keep the complaint number and obtain a copy of the report.  Immediately begin to keep a behavior log for your case.
  • Allow an answering machine to screen all of your phone calls and save the messages.  Save any letter(s), emails, text messages, packages or gifts from the stalker.
  • Vary your routes to and from work or school.  Inform your building, office or campus security guards that someone is stalking you.  Travel with a companion whenever possible.
  • Keep your windows and doors locked securely at home and in your car.
  • Obtain a cellular phone for use outside of your home and in your car.  You do not have to have service or a contract with a cellular company to dial 911, just be sure to keep the cell phone charged.
  • Install deadbolts (one keyed AND one keyless) on every exterior door.  Have your existing doorknob locks changed as well as any existing keyed deadbolts and keep extra keys.  Secure windows with safety devices appropriate for the type of sliding glass door or window.  If possible, install a motion sensor light and an alarm system.  Keep lights and a radio or television on at different times.  Don’t sleep near a window and keep your shades drawn.
  • Tell trusted family members, friends, neighbors and employers that you are being stalked.  Provide them with a photo and description of the stalker and any vehicle information they he/she may drive.
  • Obtain an unlisted phone number or a phone number in someone else’s name.  Use a pager and give the number only to close family members and friends that WILL NOT have contact with the stalker.
  • If you feel that you are being followed, drive to a police or fire station.  Do not drive home.
  • Install wide-angle viewers and positively identify all visitors before opening your door.  Have a “peephole” installed on exterior doors and use them before opening your doors.
  • Visually  check front and rear passenger compartments before entering your vehicle, check your tires and vehicle for damage.  Always park in well lit areas.
  • If you have children, notify their schools of the situation, provide a photo and description with explicit instructions in writing.
  • Maintain a private post office box if your residence is confidential.
  • Obtain Caller Id, order a complete blocking of your phone number to ensure your number is not disclosed.  Utilize anonymous call reject or call blocking.  Notify the annoyance call bureau of harassing phone calls.  After you have filed a police report, you may be eligible for call tracing.

Take care and STAY SAFE!

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