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Posts Tagged ‘Stalking’

“FEMALES & GUNS”, Myths=Excuses / Facts=Reality

October 23, 2012 Comments off

Even though I have shot guns since I was in junior high school, had a concealed carry permit in my lifetime and I support the Right To Bear Arms; I do not support the myth, “I own a gun and that is the best possible method of self-defense. If someone attacks me, I can use it to protect myself.”

Let’s take a look at why not……the facts/reality of such myth. First, I say congratulations! I have heard this comment from females and males on behalf of the women in their lives with a cavalier attitude – all thinking/feeling that if owning a gun is the only sufficient method of personal safety/self-defense. Weapons are advantageous and necessary when situations demand their use. Our military are not equipped with bottles of pepper spray, really loud whistles and table knives. Our soldiers are armed with top-of-the line deadly weapons in order to fulfill their duties to be able to fight defensively during wartime. Good common sense.

Supporting the right to bear arms comes in when you wake up in the middle of the night, you hear a strange noise, having a gun safely in your night stand is a good thing. You will probably have enough time to make a 911 call; get your weapon, gather up enough courage to head toward the direction of the noise and attempt to intimidate and stall him until the police arrive. A gun is a handy when it is used with KNOWLEDGE, GOOD JUDGMENT AND RESPECT. Most important…….it’s best IF you have time to use it.

Realistically, when you are attacked by an assailant, it happens without warning. You are not given the smallest margin of time to prepare your defense. I don’t care what your weapon of choice is you will not be given the time necessary to pull it out and use it. If you are unexpectedly pushed or ambushed to the ground, even if you have your weapon in your pocketbook, it’s not going to help the situation. When faced with predicaments the call for immediate personal safety training/self-defense, only two thing are readily available – your MIND AND BODY. That’s all you have.

Guns are useful in certain situations or as a means of intimidation; the odds of being able to access a weapon in enough time so that it retains its benefits are pretty damn slim. A gun in your safety box or save at your home won’t help you when someone attacks you while you are jogging in the park.

Learn how to use yourself as a weapon and you might not have to worry about owning a gun. This same principle applies to any weapons – including pepper spray, Mace or knives.

Food for thought…….why do you think our military and law enforcement are taught “hand-to-hand combat” extensively in training? Simple answer…….they may not have enough time to draw their weapons to defend themselves in an altercation. They must know how to protect and defend themselves “realistically” with their minds and bodies rather than depending on their weapon.

So, why wouldn’t you do everything in your power to learn how to use your mind and body “realistically” to defend yourself?

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Stalking IS a C-R-I-M-E!

January 7, 2012 3 comments

STALKING IS A CRIME!

“He Was Really Scary…I Had a Stalker”

Me and my mom were volunteering to set up for a dance at a country club. We’d already volunteered a few times, but this time we met a few other volunteers there. There was a woman and her son. So her son kept coming up to me and asking me questions about how to set up the tables and where they kept the food we were supposed to put out, so basically all of the questions the guy who owned the place had already answered. I figured he just needed a friend. I wasn’t creeped out until he started staring at me. I would look at him and he would look away, but right when I looked away out of the corner of my eye I could see him looking at me again. I was kind of freaked out, so after I was done volunteering that day my mom said we could leave. I went to get my coat and he followed me and asked me if I was coming to the dance. I told him no, and he looked like he was very mad at me and he walked away. So me and my mom leave, and I forget about this guy. Then like 2 weeks later I get this phone call, and I answer and it’s the guy I met at the volunteering place. He asks me if I’m busy that day and I tell him sorry I am and he yells at me and hangs up. I never gave him my number and I wasn’t sure how he got it. Then he called later that night and said he was sorry for calling and yelling at me. He asks me if I’m busy the next day. I tell him I’m sorry but I am. He doesn’t say anything and he just says bye and hangs up. So basically he just kept calling me every day and asking me if I was busy. I got sick of him calling and when he would call I would have a family member answer and say I wasn’t home. Then in the middle of the night I was up and I was in the kitchen getting something to drink when I hear a knock at my slider door and I see him standing there with a flashlight. I screamed and then ran to my parents room. My dad gets up and he doesn’t see him and our door was locked so we know he didn’t get inside. I slept in their room and then a few months passed. He calls my house again and asks me why I didn’t let him in. I hang up on him and block his number. He gets another phone and calls my house and he asks why his girlfriend (me) blocked his number. I told him I wasn’t his girlfriend and he needs to leave me alone or I was going to call the cops. He chickens out for a few years. Then I’m in my senior year of high school and he comes to my door asking if I remember him. I tell him that I have a boyfriend and that he needs to go away. He waited outside my school in the parking lot and then he asked if i wanted a ride. I tell him no I have a ride and he gets mad and yells at me. I got a ride from one of my friends and he follows us so she drives around and eventually he gives up. A few days later her tires are slashed. I’m asleep in my room the next night and he breaks open my window and comes inside. I’m screaming at the top of my lungs but my parents are on a cruise and I’m the only one home. I was positive I was going to die. I finally stop screaming because I’m crying so hard and he’s just making it worse by trying to hug me and comfort me and crap and I start screaming for help. He says he’s going to take me somewhere and were going to run away together and while he’s saying his whole plan the cops get there. He tried to run but the cops cought him and then took him to prison. So now it’s years later and I’m married and I found out the neighbor across the street heard me screaming and called the cops when she saw the window broken. I also found out that the guy who owned the country club gave him my address because he said we left stuff there and he was going to bring it to our house. So I’ve never volunteered anywhere besides schools ever since then.

The above stalking victim wrote in her own words what and how her stalker stalked her.  I find that it helps to share with readers real life experiences of victims so just perhaps you will have a better understanding of the devastating effects that stalking have on victims of this serious crime.

As you can see stalking cases are carried out by ex-partners or by someone that you have never had close relationship with, many victims have never even met their stalker. Often a victim’s stalker can be someone known through work, or a friend of a friend or it could be someone you pass on the street. And with the internet as huge as it is, sometimes people never set eyes on their stalker.

One of the main problems is that so many of us are brought up to be polite and kind, and rather to rebuff unwanted attention, we often let it go. We find ourselves in slightly awkward situations and do not make it clear that we are unhappy. For example, with repeated text messages from someone we don’t know well, we might reply politely to one or two. After that we might ignore them, when perhaps the best although not necessarily the easiest thing to do is say that you do not want any more texts. The number of stalking victims are alarming and terrifying.

Victims must get help that they need and deserve. Until a victim speaks to someone who has been stalked, you never will fully understand how terrifying it truly is. Being stalked is extremely distressing, a victim is used as a plaything for the stalker’s amusement.

Stalking is a serious crime which usually hits the headlines when it’s linked to A-list celebs, but falling prey to a stalker is something that never crosses most of our minds. Stalking is on the rise as both women and men are being targeted by predatory stalkers.

If you are stalked:

First and foremost, have no contact with your stalker.

  • Show no emotion, regardless of how scared or angry you are. Never confront or agree to meet your stalker.
  • Trust your instincts. If you feel uncomfortable reach out for help.
  • Carry a cell phone with you at all times. Keep handy, memorize emergency phone numbers or program them into your speed dial in case of an emergency.
  • Call your local law enforcement and file a report of all incidents.
  • Tell your friends, family, neighbors, work colleagues and employer. All have the right to know what is happening for your safety as well as their own.
  • Try not to travel alone. Always vary your routes to and from work or school, the grocery store and any other places regularly visited. By changing your daily routes, it could make it more difficult for someone to learn your routine. If you run or walk for exercise, always get a friend (buddy) to go with you.
  • Keep evidence like texts, emails, letters and parcels. Record anything that could be proof and keep Stalker and Incident Behavior Log for reference.
  • If you are being followed, try to stay calm. If you’re driving, head for the nearest police department to get help.
  • If you ever feel in imminent danger, call 911.

The more the public becomes aware of the effects and toll that stalking can do to a victim – perhaps the more we will realize that STALKING IS A CRIME and it is NEVER the victim’s fault.

Every day should be an internal check about every awareness. Focusing on just one month a year of any specific cause is so minuet as the EPIDEMIC of assaults on females are off the charts.

STALKING: KNOW IT. NAME IT. STOP IT.

Take care and STAY SAFE!

“It’s Time To Get Your Head Out Of The Sand…”

July 14, 2011 2 comments

Becoming educated makes a person more understanding, more aware and more comfortable with the truth.  I am personally becoming more and more appalled with parents that do exactly what is displayed in the picture above.  And, then I get phone calls and emails that their daughters have been assaulted and asked to help them through the system at the schools and law enforcement departments.  Makes me shake my head and ask………”Didn’t you even take the opportunity to check into the crimes stats BEFORE even visiting? Or, spend a some money on giving her the education and advantage of personal safety?”  The majority of the time is “NO”.

It is time for females AND parents to get their heads out of the sand, understand the myths (excuses) and learn the facts (reality) of “realisitic” personal safety training/self-defense and to become proactive. There is not one form of personal safety training/self-defense that is 100% guaranteed. Weapons of every kind are not a guarantee either (we’ll look at this too). However, with education at least you may be able to detect (awareness), learn the ability to de-escalate a potentially dangerous situation and ultimately if a physical altercation occurs you will be better equipped with the knowledge of “realistic” defense.

We all have excuses for things in our lives that we don’t do or spend too much time doing. These excuses serve as deterrents preventing us from following through with action and benefits. When you begin to understand or experience the consequences of your excuses you get a really good reality check. This reality check (wake-up call) usually changes your way of thinking automatically.

The “myth concept” not only affects many areas in our lives but also has the same influence in the personal safety training/self-defense world. These myths make females apprehensive toward or opposed to personal safety training/self-defense.

A myth can be and often is used as an excuse for not doing something. 

The attitude, “it won’t happen to me” is a huge myth; every female should look in the mirror and realize that victimization does not discriminate. This is just plain ignorance if you believe that the possibility that you cannot be a victim is true. You have to debunk the thought that learning personal safety training/self-defense carries negative characteristics (aggression, arrogance, or violence). And, by not understanding that if trained properly to obtain the mental and physical abilities that you can possibly prevent or de-escalate an attack is a total underestimation on your part.

When we begin to understand the facts=reality of these myths=excuses we begin to understand objectives, the effectiveness and the technique of personal safety training/self-defense. We can save our life or the life of someone we love. We can prevent ourselves from becoming a statistic of crime. As I stated above, personal safety training/self-defense is not a guaranteed free pass from crime; however, your chances of survival and the ability to detect a possible altercation are increased significantly.

Becoming educated your level of awareness increases or is heightened, your intuition (gut instincts) are better in tune and your physical abilities are sharpened so that your chances of being attacked, raped or murdered are statistically lessened. You won’t broadcast that you know “self-defense” but you won’t walk down a certain street or in an area when your instincts (gut) kicks in and tells you to turn back. When someone grabs you from behind you won’t freeze but immediately your reaction will be to fight back upon recognition of your window of opportunity. You will see that a seemingly hopeless and defenseless situation has more opportunities for defense than you could have ever imagined.

Personal safety training/self-defense is NOT about being paranoid, it IS about being smart!

Knowledge is a powerful tool.

Stop making excuses and do something powerful for yourself and your loved ones – obtain Personal Safety Training. Training (mind, body and soul) that you will have for the rest of your life.

How can any parent put a price tag on the life of their daughter?  Why wouldn’t you want your daughter in high school/middle school and especially college bound to be educated?

Question……beside looking at the pretty websites and visiting University after University…..has anyone truly looked in the stats of these schools as to their crime stats via The Jean Cleary Act or Title IX?  Parents…..do your homework.  In my book……………NO CAMPUS IS CRIME FREE AND THE NUMBER OF FEMALE STUDENTS BEING ASSAULTED (BY SOMEONE THEY KNOW OR RANDOM) IS OFF THE CHARTS.  Parents……give your daughter the tools for her tool belt, give her the opportunity that she will have for the rest of her life.  No parent wants to receive “that phone call”; trust me.  (*Again, no personal safety course is 100% guaranteed, but even if she gains 50% knowledge of what she never had to begin with isn’t that worth something?)  Think about…………long and hard.  Again, can you honestly put a price tag on your daughter’s life?  Most parents answer is “NO”.

How can any female NOT want to be proactive and at least have the knowledge of COULD happen if I don’t know personal safety?  Personal safety is so much more than watching a DVD in your livingroom – it is truly about education and ultimately physically how to protect oneself.  Girls talk to your parents……this is an exciting time but you guys have to know the possibilities and reality.  Not to “scare” you but you have to know the odds and know how to handle situations.

Parents – get involved in your daughter’s safety during college.  Parents or Gals……contact me for details as we are gearing up our tour to bring personal safety training (6 hours on one weekend day) to communities everywhere! Organizers of training’s will train for FREE!

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Know the Facts About Who IS Lurking On the Internet…for Your Kids Sake

March 9, 2011 Comments off

Kids on Facebook – Every parent, adult and child must be educated about internet safety.  Please read, digest and share the following information with your loved ones and others.  You never know how many lives you may touch today.

After tossing her books on the sofa, she decided to grab a snack and get on-line. She logged on under her screen name ByAngel213. She checked her Buddy List and saw GoTo123 was on. She sent him an instant message:

ByAngel213:

Hi. I’m glad you are on! I thought someone was following me home today. It was really weird!

GoTo123:

LOL You watch too much TV. Why would someone be following you? Don’t you live in a safe neighborhood?

ByAngel213:

Of course I do. LOL I guess it was my imagination cuz’ I didn’t see anybody when I looked out.

GoTo123:

Unless you gave your name out on-line. You haven’t done that have you?

ByAngel213:

Of course not. I’m not stupid you know.

GoTo123:

Did you have a softball game after school today?

ByAngel213:

Yes, and we won!!

GoTo123:

That’s great! Who did you play?

ByAngel213:

We played the Hornets. LOL. Their uniforms are so gross! They look like bees. LOL

GoTo123:

What is your team called?

ByAngel213:

We are the Canton Cats. We have tiger paws on our uniforms. They are really cool.

GoTo123:

Did you pitch?

ByAngel213:

No, I play second base. I got to go. My homework has to be done before my parents get home. I don’t want them mad at me. Bye!

GoTo123:

Catch you later. Bye

Meanwhile, GoTo123 went to the member menu and began to search for her profile. When it came up, he highlighted it and printed it out. He took out a pen and began to write down what he knew about Angel so far.

Her name: Shannon

Birthday: Jan. 3, 1985

Age: 13

State where she lived: North Carolina

Hobbies: softball, chorus, skating and going to the mall. Besides this information, he knew she lived in Canton because she had just told him. He knew she stayed by herself until 6:30 p.m. every afternoon until her parents came home from work. He knew she played softball on Thursday afternoons on the school team, and the team was named the Canton Cats. Her favorite number 7 was printed on her jersey. He knew she was in the eighth grade at the Canton Junior High School. She had told him all this in the conversations they had on-line. He had enough information to find her now.

Shannon didn’t tell her parents about the incident on the way home from the ballpark that day. She didn’t want them to make a scene and stop her from walking home from the softball games. Parents were always overreacting and hers were the worst. It made her wish she was not an only child. Maybe if she had brothers and sisters, her parents wouldn’t be so overprotective.

By Thursday, Shannon had forgotten about the footsteps following her.

Her game was in full swing when suddenly she felt someone staring at her. It was then that the memory came back. She glanced up from her second base position to see a man watching her closely.

He was leaning against the fence behind first base and he smiled when she looked at him. He didn’t look scary and she quickly dismissed the sudden fear she had felt.

After the game, he sat on a bleacher while she talked to the coach. She noticed his smile once again as she walked past him.. He nodded and she smiled back. He noticed her name on the back of her shirt. He knew he had found her.

Quietly, he walked a safe distance behind her. It was only a few blocks to Shannon’s home, and once he saw where she lived he quickly returned to the park to get his car.

Now he had to wait. He decided to get a bite to eat until the time came to go to Shannon’s house. He drove to a fast food restaurant and sat there until time to make his move.

Shannon was in her room later that evening when she heard voices in the living room.

“Shannon, come here,” her father called. He sounded upset and she couldn’t imagine why. She went into the room to see the man from the ballpark sitting on the sofa.

“Sit down,” her father began, “this man has just told us a most interesting story about you.”

Shannon sat back. How could he tell her parents anything? She had never seen him before today!

“Do you know who I am, Shannon ?” the man asked.

“No,” Shannon answered.

“I am a police officer and your online friend, GoTo123.”

Shannon was stunned. “That’s impossible! GoTo123 is a kid my age! He’s 14. And he lives in Michigan !”

The man smiled. “I know I told you all that, but it wasn’t true. You see, Shannon , there are people on-line who pretend to be kids; I was one of them. But while others do it to injure kids and hurt them, I belong to a group of parents who do it to protect kids from predators. I came here to find you to teach you how dangerous it is to talk to people on-line. You told me enough about yourself to make it easy for me to find you. You named the school you went to, the name of your ball team and the position you played. The number and name on your jersey just made finding you a breeze.”

Shannon was stunned. “You mean you don’t live in Michigan ?”

He laughed. “No, I live in Raleigh . It made you feel safe to think I was so far away, didn’t it?”

She nodded.

“I had a friend whose daughter was like you. Only she wasn’t as lucky. The guy found her, did bad things to her and then murdered her while she was home alone. Kids are taught not to tell anyone when they are alone, yet they do it all the time on-line. The wrong people trick you into giving out information a little here and there on-line. Before you know it, you have told them enough for them to find you without even realizing you have done it. I hope you’ve learned a lesson from this and won’t do it again. And, please tell others about this so they will be safe too, okay?”

“It’s a promise!”

That night Shannon and her Dad and Mom thanked God for protecting Shannon from what could have been a tragic situation.

Address/Location

Madison Police Dept.

116 Center St W

Madison, SD 57042

Via Amber Alerts-us

Take care and STAY SAFE!


Murphy-Milano News!

March 8, 2011 Comments off


What’s Going On!

Dear Friends,

Like everyone, I have my good and bad days.  On the mornings where I have to force myself from the warmth and comfort of my bed, I think to myself, ” is what I am doing all worth it?”  We are battling a legal system that clearly requires a total overhaul as it relates to intimate partner violence and homicide.  All it takes is a split second to remember my mothers lost battle to live without the threat of violence and I snap out of my funk.

The radio shows each week are having a profound impact on the lives of families and victims seeking justice.  For me to continue sounding the siren for justice in missing persons, unsolved homicides, suspicious deaths and intimate partner safety, I am asking for a moment of your time.  The shows, “Crime Wire”, “The Roth Show” and “Times Up!”  are 4 hours of national attention, exposure and accountability for victims and their families.  But what good are they if we do not promote them on our websites, social networks and places where the general public reads, on sites such as Nancy Grace, Geraldo at Large or CNN?  I see people writing on CNN iReports begging for justice on an unsolved or missing persons case, or trying to stay alive while living in a war zone in their homes behind closed doors.  Who is answering them?

Take the information from this newsletter by cutting, pasting and list the information on your sites.  Send it in a blast email to members in your community, places of worship and others seeking answers.  Give hope to those living without light as they search for answers.

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.”

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Thank you and God Bless,

Susan

Thank you to all the listeners who helped get my show on the “Top Ten” of Zeus Radio Network!

 

National Conference for Missing Persons

Please plan to join me at the
CUE Center for Missing Persons Conference!

HOPE LIGHTS THE WAY

The 7th Annual National Round Table Conference
March 24th Thur 27th of 2011

To REGISTER and more information:
http://www.ncmissingpersons.org/national-conference-2/

Thursdays from 2pm to 4pm Eastern

The Susan Murphy Milano Show

“Time’s Up!”

Thursday, March 10

2pm-3pm:

Lynn Tolson


Author of “Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor’s Story”, a memoir about overcoming abuse and adversity. About mind, body, spirit transformation and a message of hope.

Joe Turner, father of murdered Chanda Turner, and spearheading the reform of the Oklahoma medical examiners office Senate Bill SB250 (www.justiceforthedead.com) will be calling in from the steps of the Oklahoma capital for a report on the progress of the bill.

3pm-4pm:
“Police Officer Involved Family Violence”


Guests:

Wives of police officeers, Bernadette Avila, Clara Colon and the family of  Nancy Rojo, who as a witnesses watched,  Sheriff Alexander Rojo pulled out a handgun and, without saying a word, shot his wife three times, stood over her and fired five more bullets, according to police. He then sat down on the street curb and shot himself.

 

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Lawmaker proposes relabeling rape victims as ‘accusers’

February 10, 2011 2 comments

Victim:

Someone who has been harmed, injured or killed as the result of a crime.

Crime:

An illegal activity or action.

A Georgia state lawmaker with a history of operating on the political fringe has filed a bill stripping the term “victim” from rape, stalking and domestic violence cases.

Rep. Bobby Franklin, a Republican from the Atlanta suburb of Cobb County, filed the bill in November but it only recently came to public attention.

Franklin’s bill would eliminate the word “victim” from statutes dealing with stalking, rape, obscene telephone contact with a child and family violence and replace it with “accuser.”

It also strikes the word “victim” from statutes dealing with electronic pretrial monitoring, HIV testing of criminal defendants and pretrial discovery, the exchange of crucial information between attorneys prior to the start of a criminal trial.

It wasn’t clear why Franklin’s legislation includes only those specific laws, or whether it would affect how people who file complaints about other crimes, such as child molestation, assault or theft might be described.

Franklin did not return a telephone message or e-mail to his office on Monday.

The proposed change angered some who felt that Franklin meant the legislation as an attack on rape victims and on women, who comprise the overwhelming majority of victims of sexual assault.

“I am dismayed … angry … and shocked by your wacked out ideologies concerning VICTIMS of rape,” one commenter wrote on Franklin’s Facebook page.

Carolyn Fiddler, the communications director for the Democratic Legislative Campaign Committee, wrote on the organization’s website that the legislation diminishes rape victims by questioning whether what happened to them is even a crime.

“Burglary victims are still victims. Assault victims are still victims. Fraud victims are still victims,” she wrote. “But if you have the misfortune to suffer a rape, or if you are beaten by a domestic partner, or if you are stalked, Rep. Franklin doesn’t think you have been victimized.”

In an interview with CNN Monday, Fiddler said she would like to think that Franklin didn’t mean to diminish rape victims with the legislation. But she said the language displayed a “lack of empathy and awareness.”

There is some merit in the idea of neutralizing legal and courtroom language to help focus potential jurors on the facts of a case, instead of the emotions raised by issues of rape and similar offenses, said Russell Gabriel, director of the University of Georgia School of Law’s Criminal Defense Clinic.

Respectfully submitted via the CNN Wire Staff

 

Risk Assessment of Stalking and Safety Plan Suggestions…

January 23, 2011 Comments off

What is stalking?

While legal definitions of stalking vary from one jurisdiction to another, a good working definition of stalking is a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear.

Stalking is another form of Power and Control; in reality it is mental abuse.

Stalking is serious, often violent, and can escalate over time.

Risk Assessment

Questions to ask a victim:  Has anyone ever:

  • Followed or spied on you more than twice?
  • Made repeated, unwanted phone calls to you?
  • Stood outside your home, school, office?
  • Left unwanted gifts or items for you to find?
  • Vandalized or damaged your property?
  • Repeatedly threatened you/those close to you?
  • Showed up at places you were for no apparent reason?

Safety Plan Suggestions for Victims of Stalking

  • IF YOU HAVE AN EMERGENCY, CALL 911
  • Do not attempt to negotiate with a stalker, do not have any contact or communication.
  • Telling a stalker ten times to leave you alone is nine times too many, be consistent.
  • If you have an order of protection, carry it with you at all times, keep extra copies.
  • If you think you are being stalked, call the police.  Make sure each incident is reported to the police, keep the complaint number and obtain a copy of the report.  Immediately begin to keep a behavior log for your case.
  • Allow an answering machine to screen all of your phone calls and save the messages.  Save any letter(s), emails, text messages, packages or gifts from the stalker.
  • Vary your routes to and from work or school.  Inform your building, office or campus security guards that someone is stalking you.  Travel with a companion whenever possible.
  • Keep your windows and doors locked securely at home and in your car.
  • Obtain a cellular phone for use outside of your home and in your car.  You do not have to have service or a contract with a cellular company to dial 911, just be sure to keep the cell phone charged.
  • Install deadbolts (one keyed AND one keyless) on every exterior door.  Have your existing doorknob locks changed as well as any existing keyed deadbolts and keep extra keys.  Secure windows with safety devices appropriate for the type of sliding glass door or window.  If possible, install a motion sensor light and an alarm system.  Keep lights and a radio or television on at different times.  Don’t sleep near a window and keep your shades drawn.
  • Tell trusted family members, friends, neighbors and employers that you are being stalked.  Provide them with a photo and description of the stalker and any vehicle information they he/she may drive.
  • Obtain an unlisted phone number or a phone number in someone else’s name.  Use a pager and give the number only to close family members and friends that WILL NOT have contact with the stalker.
  • If you feel that you are being followed, drive to a police or fire station.  Do not drive home.
  • Install wide-angle viewers and positively identify all visitors before opening your door.  Have a “peephole” installed on exterior doors and use them before opening your doors.
  • Visually  check front and rear passenger compartments before entering your vehicle, check your tires and vehicle for damage.  Always park in well lit areas.
  • If you have children, notify their schools of the situation, provide a photo and description with explicit instructions in writing.
  • Maintain a private post office box if your residence is confidential.
  • Obtain Caller Id, order a complete blocking of your phone number to ensure your number is not disclosed.  Utilize anonymous call reject or call blocking.  Notify the annoyance call bureau of harassing phone calls.  After you have filed a police report, you may be eligible for call tracing.

Take care and STAY SAFE!

Anny Jacoby’s Appearances for National Stalking Awareness Month via ImaginePublicity

January 13, 2011 Comments off

January is National Stalking Awareness Month

Stalking is a repetitive pattern of unwanted, harassing or threatening behavior committed by one person against another.  Acts include: telephone harassment, being followed, receiving unwanted gifts, and other similar forms of intrusive behavior.  All states and the Federal Government have passed anti-stalking legislation.  Definitions may vary state-to-state but most define stalking as “the willful, malicious, and repeated following and harassing of another person that threatens his or her safety”.

Anny Jacoby

Anny Jacoby, Personal Safety Expert and Certified Self-Defense Coach, will be making appearances to enhance awareness during January, National Stalking Awareness Month.

Anny’s mission is to reach out to every avenue available to teach these skills at the corporate level, to emergency services, victim support groups and agencies, schools, colleges and health service providers. Her professional programs are designed for every age group from children to seniors, as well as a program designed specifically for the disabled.

Lavinia Masters

Lavinia Masters serves as a speaker, volunteer and Sexual Assault Response Team Member for Denton County Friends of the Family Rape Crisis Center, a national speaker for Rape Abuse And Incest Network (RAINN), and a spokesperson for the Dallas Police Department Sexual Assault Cold Case Program (SEACAP). Lavinia also founded and is the director of the S.A.V.E. ( Sexual Abuse Victim Empowering) Ministry and the facilitator of S.A.S.S.I. (Sexual Abuse Support Survivor Initiative).

The Lavinia Masters Show on BlogTalk Radio

Tune in Thursday evening, January 13, at 8pmEST to listen to Anny Jacoby and Lavinia Masters discuss the many aspects of stalking and how toinsure your safety should you be the victim of a stalker.

Go to the link to Listen and Chat Live:

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/lavinia-masters/2011/01/14/its-not-a-joke-its-not-romantic-its-not-okay-its-a-crimestop-stalking-with-anny-jacoby

Peas In Their Pods

Peas In Their Pods Organizational goal takes pride in helping to find missing children of color, fight against child abuse, and provide information to the public.

Every 40 seconds a child is reported missing in the United States. Under 45% are African American Children.

Peas In Their Pods Radio on BlogTalk Radio

On Sunday, January 16, 7PM EST, Anny Jacoby will be appearing on the popular internet radio show, Peas In Their Pods, presented by an organization which helps the plight of missing children by filling in the gap when an Amber Alert criteria isn’t met.

Hosts Gaetane Borders and Janice Lowery, and guest, Anny Jacoby,  will be giving listeners lessons on the definition of stalking, how to know if you are being stalked, and what to do about it to be sure you are safe from danger.

Go to the link to Listen and Chat Live:

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/peasintheirpods/2011/01/17/peas-in-their-pods

To schedule an appearance by Anny Jacoby, Lavinia Masters or a representative from Peas In Their Pods, please contact ImaginePublcity by filling in the form below or call 843.808.0859.

 

Stalking Victim Presses for Employment Protection

January 11, 2011 Comments off

An anti-stalking bill in the Senate Judiciary Committee imposes tougher punishment on offenders and expands the definition of the crime to include online privacy intrusions. But one victim says it lacks a crucial component: employment protection.

A congressional anti-stalking bill that passed the U.S. House of Representatives last summer, now sitting in the Senate Judiciary Committee, has a number of prominent supporters.

One is Erin Andrews, an ESPN sports correspondent whose stalker secretly filmed her getting undressed and then posted videos of her naked on the Internet. Andrews has given congressional testimony and several press conferences on the importance of the bill.

An estimated 3.4 million people were victims of stalking in 2009, according to the Bureau of Justice Statistics.

Andrews’ stalker, Michael Barrett, was sentenced in March 2010 to 30 months in prison. According to media reports, Andrews was angered by what she saw as a lenient sentence.

The bill–Simplifying The Ambiguous Law, Keeping Everyone Reliably Safe, or STALKERS Act–extends the definition of stalking to include cyberstalking. It also lengthens offenders’ prison terms by a maximum of five years when they are in violation of a protection order and when the victim is under 18 or over 65. This would allow for some convicted stalkers to serve up to 10 years in prison.

Some stalking victims say the bill has a crucial weakness: no provision for those whose employment is jeopardized by their stalking complaints.

Dawn V. Martin, an attorney, claims her own victimization by a stalker caused her to lose her post as a Howard University law professor.

“No woman should have to choose between her safety and her job,” Martin said in a recent phone interview. “If she isn’t protected under the law, then a woman could choose to keep her victimization a secret from her employer. The result would be endangering herself and her coworkers because she fears losing her job if she speaks up.”

Women Often Lose Jobs

Ludy Green, who has worked in human resources for two decades, agrees. She has spent 20 years advocating for the rights of stalking and domestic violence victims in the workplace.

“When a woman is being stalked in the workplace, companies often fire them or don’t renew contracts for fear of putting their other employees in danger or fear of legal action if they don’t provide sufficient protection and someone gets hurt,” said Green, founder of Second Chance Employment Services, a Washington, D.C., nonprofit that secures meaningful employment for women who have been victimized by stalking, domestic violence and human trafficking.

“Sometimes employers let women go because they’re not educated in how to deal with these situations and they just want the problem to go away,” she said. “But this is something that comes from misunderstanding the situation. The last thing a victim needs is to lose her job.”

Martin says Howard University administrators ignored the advice of the Washington, D.C., police to provide her with protection on campus after she reported being pursued by a “serial stalker,” one with a history of stalking female law professors on other campuses as well as female lawyers.

The stalking began in November 1997, her second year at Howard.

When the law school decided against renewing her contract the following month–in December–it cited a lack of available positions.

Martin detected a connection to her stalking complaint and in 1999 she sued for sexual harassment, hostile work environment and retaliation for reporting sexual harassment under TitleVII, the Civil Rights Act of 1964, and the Washington, D.C., Human Rights Act.

During legal proceedings it came out that several positions had been open when her contract was not renewed. One concerned equal employment opportunity law, an area of her expertise. The dean of the law school had withheld the vacancies from the Appointments, Tenure and Promotions Committee responsible for reviewing Martin’s contract renewal.

Precedent-Setting Decision

The U.S. District Court for Washington, D.C., issued a precedent-setting decision in her case: that an employer can be held liable for the sexual harassment of an employee by a non-employee if the employer knew of the harassment and failed to take reasonable steps to end it.

In its defense, Howard argued that Martin was not protected under Title VII because her memos characterized her troubles as “stalking” and a “security problem” rather than using the words “sexual harassment.”

The same court’s 1999 decision held that a victim needn’t specifically refer to sexual harassment to invoke Title VII, but the judge refused to instruct the jury, which had asked for guidance.

Martin lost the case when the jury determined that stalking did not constitute sexual harassment within the meaning of Title VII.

Martin said it boiled down to a question of law, not a question of fact for the jury.

“If Title VII had included victims of stalking, I would have won my case,” said Martin. “Nobody denied I was being stalked on campus.”

Both the National Association of Women Lawyers, based in Chicago, and the Washington, D.C.-based National Organization for Women filed briefs in support of Martin’s claims.

Last November, Martin filed an appeal and she is now seeking support from other women’s groups. She thinks it’s more effective to push this through the courts than to amend the bill now pending in the legislature.

Martin also believes Title VII should be amended to include victims of stalking and domestic violence.

She says the language can be taken directly from the New York City Human Rights Law, Title 8, which was amended in January 2001 to prohibit employment discrimination against victims of domestic violence and in December 2003 to include victims of stalking.

“All the federal government has to do is lift the language directly out of the New York City law,” said Martin.

 

Respectfully submitted via Women’s enews


Loughner STALKED Giffords For Three Years

January 10, 2011 Comments off

 

Killer’s eerie note: ‘I planned ahead’

He had her in his cross hairs for years.

The crackpot gunman charged in the frenzied ambush of Arizona Rep. Gabrielle Giffords on Saturday had stashed handwritten messages in his basement safe bearing the chilling words: “Gifford,” “My assassination” and “I planned ahead,” authorities said yesterday.

Accused killer Jared Lee Loughner, 22, signed at least one of the pieces of paper, which he put in a single envelope and placed in the safe at his parents’ modest one-story home in the northwest section of the city, according to charges filed yesterday in federal court in Phoenix.

Also inside the safe was a letter on Giffords’ congressional stationery thanking Loughner for attending one of her “Congress on your Corner” events at a mall in Tucson in 2007.

Loughner had asked Giffords at the event, “What is government if words have no meaning?” according to two friends from high school.

A former classmate, Caitie Parker — who has called the suspect “left wing” and “a pothead” — tweeted that after that event, Loughner said he thought Giffords was “stupid” and “unintelligent.”

That mall event was the same type Loughner invaded Saturday, when he shot Giffords point-blank in the head and killed six others, authorities said.

The same year that Loughner attended the event with Giffords, he began a descent into drug use and erratic behavior, records show.

In October 2007, Loughner was cited by the Pima County Sheriff’s Department for possession of drug paraphernalia, a charge that was dismissed a month later when he completed a court-ordered program.

A year later, he faced a charge in Marana Municipal Court that was dismissed after the completion of another program. The charge was never made public.

It was also in 2008 that Loughner tried to enlist in the Army but was rejected after reportedly failing his drug test.

He soon enrolled at Pima Community College, where his wacko behavior immediately alarmed students and professors.

Pima officials said in a statement that from February to September 2010, campus cops were called on Loughner five times because of classroom and library disruptions.

He was suspended after college police discovered a YouTube video in which Loughner claimed the college was “illegal.”

Along with the suspension came a terse letter to Loughner’s parents stating if he wanted to come back, he’d have to “obtain a mental-health clearance” from a professional,” the school said. Loughner dropped out instead.

Pima math teacher Ben McGahee said Loughner worried him.

“I always felt, you know, somewhat paranoid,” McGahee told The Washington Post. “When I turned my back to write on the board, I would always turn back quickly — to see if he had a gun.”

An older student in the class, Lynda Sorenson, 52, was scared stiff of the lunatic. She wrote e-mails — provided to The Washington Post — alluding to Loughner’s antics.

“He scares me a bit . . . Hopefully he will be out of class very soon, and not come back with an automatic weapon,” she wrote on June 1, the first day of class.

The feds are reportedly looking into whether he joined an anti-Semitic, anti-government hate group.

According to a Department of Homeland Security memo, the agency is trying to determine whether Loughner is linked to the fanatical group American Renaissance, Fox News reported The group promotes views that are “anti-government, anti-immigration, anti-ZOG (Zionist Occupation Government), anti-Semitic,” the memo says.

Giffords is “the first Jewish female elected to such a high-position in the US government. She was also opposite the group’s ideology when it came to immigration debate,” according the memo.

Jared Taylor, editor of American Renaissance, vehemently denied any association with Loughner.

Loughner grew up in a neighborhood of ranch-style and split-level homes, with parents whom neighbors described as loners.

Neither of Loughner’s parents was home yesterday.

Loughner could face death by lethal injection if he’s convicted of murder in the horrific shooting case. He’ll be arraigned today in federal court in Phoenix.

Respectfully submitted via NYPost
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